1818 Redmon-- the Ghetto version

:cue music:
Presenting... the LADIES OF 1818 REDMON

She's responsible for making sweet tea an illegal beverage in the Southern States, her cooking skills are known throughout the land...
presenting HOMECAKE!
Your gangsta name: Homecake
How you get shot: Ridin' yo' low-rider (bike) to work.
Your weapon: Rusty switchblade you stole from a whitey.
Your bling: Fake silver chain.
Your ride: You can't afford no ride, wanksta.


Her weapon of choice is a spool of floss and she's known to have a drill handy too. Don't cross her if you haven't recently brushed...
presenting Homie G Boo!
Your gangsta name: Homie G Boo
How you get shot: Stealing some nigga's cornbread.
Your weapon: Curling iron you stole from yo' sister.
Your bling: Platinum fronts.
Your ride: BMW. (Black man walkin'.)


Clearly, this woman of integrity takes the cake in percentage points. She can make a mean empanada and her spanish is impeccable... even if I don't speak a lick.
Presenting Gangsta Slice!
Your gangsta name: Gangsta Slice
How you get shot: Stealing some nigga's cornbread.
Your weapon: Curling iron you stole from yo' sister.
Your bling: Platinum rims.
Your ride: You can't afford no ride, wanksta.


You put a football in any endzone this side of the Mississippi and she'll catch it. She's also known for her slammin' v-ball stats. Pretty much... she's a white Venus Williams with a touch of Mia Hamm, Lisa Leslie and Sheryl Swoopes thrown in for spice.
Presenting Lil' Johnson!
Your gangsta name: Lil' Johnson
How you get shot: Yo' homie caught you playin' Furcadia.
Your weapon: Beer bottle you stole from a trashcan.
Your bling: Fake silver chain.
Your ride: BMW. (Black man walkin'.)