I remember runnin' through the wet grass...

Wow. So - I really should update more than just once a week! (..and a hearty "Hear! Hear!" is heard from the crowd...)

Where to begin? Oh, let's see - I usually post about my obscenely funny - yet not - love life. So, most of you know about my little experiment with eHarmony. About a year ago - a friend and I decided that we'd post a mutual friend on this "Christian" dating site. Well, it was impossible because of a HUMONGOUS five hundred question "personality profile" - so as usual - who gets nominated to be the guinea pig? Yep - yours truly. Now - REMEMBER THE GUINEA PIG, it'll be important later on! :-)

So....... I met Mr. eHarmony (see Lawyer/City Boy) and the rest is history, right? Oh... no no no. Not if you're kickin' it with me - it's not. I have a knack, for...well.... how do you say... spice? Yeah - so I'm looking for his law firm's website and I Google his name to get there quicker and the son-of-a-gun is ENGAGED! Yikes-o-bee! Hysterical. Then, I get really scared because what if that WAS ME? Scary, huh?

So - REMEMBER THE GUINEA PIG? Yes, it's important now because I had a wonderful visit to the porno store this weekend. What? You say... you don't visit the porn store every Saturday afternoon for kicks? And why not I ask? Ok - the guinea pig part ties in here...

Once again - I'm in on hostessing a shower for a friend. Being the practical jokester that I am (it's inherited - I claim no responsibility for the actions that directly result from the genes I had no say in receiving) I decide that we need - practical joke things. I call a friend who's equally demented and ask if she would know the location of a questionable establishment that I could enter and not feel as if I had lost my religion. She gives me two options and off I go with my wingman (should I say wingwoman? or wingperson? Please comment and let me know as there is an ongoing discussion at The House of Redmon as to what is proper these days...) in tow. Now, usually I think the title guinea pig would be bestowed upon her - but not this time. We can't find Said Establishment #1 so we go with Less Desirable Said Establishment #2. Not good. Not good at all. Let's just say.... not only did I bathe in Purell I drank it too. All of this has happened over and above WORK and before I roll over, get tangled in the mosquito-web thing (cause I sooooooooo live in Africa and need one!) above my bed, and it promptly ensnares me for the greater part of Sunday morning. Yes, folks - I'm certifiably crazy.

So - pour you a glass of milk folks, it's gonna be a good one!

Meaning

Hail to the light that my baby watches me
In the darkness of the window
I can hardly get to sleep
Wish for the hour that
The nighttime soon shall pass
And the morning dew will bring us
To a day our souls can last
Love has a reason
There's a meaning to the world
We're giving love
Situation candlelight
Enough to see the bits around you
But it's never very bright
Stare at a memory
You, through the grapevine, heard the truth
It's good to learn from your mistakes
But that only works in youth
Love has a reason
There's a meaning to the world
We're giving love
Restless minds; curtain calls follow fanfares
Troubled hearts; just a walk down the hall
Restless hearts; you take a punch just to land one
Troubled minds; it's only fair after all
Mountin, the trail, but you've got it in sight
Sometimes the only way is jumping
I hope you're not afraid of heights
Reach in my pocket for a bill that isn't there
And to face all of the undoings
Still isn't more than I can bear
Love has a reason
There's a meaning to the world
We're giving love
Giving love
Love, love
It's all been good to me
Love has reason
There's a meaning to the world
We're giving love

It's all about ME!

TEN Random Things About Me:
1o) I organize dirty dishes in the sink.
o9) I wear contacts.
o8) I was Vice President of my 3rd grade class.
o7) When I was in the 3rd grade (it was a big year!) and was co-lead in the school play, I fainted and fell on the 2nd graders in front of me.
o6) My sister and I are nothing alike... and have a TON in common
o5) Even though I'm 23, I still have bad dreams
o4) If Dr. Pepper and sweet tea were to cease to exist - I would as well
o3) I don't feel like I'm old enough to be 23...
o2) I can build a campfire better than any boy I've ever dated... (that should say something about they guys I've dated!)
o1) I'm allergic to grape juice

NINE Places I've Visited: (in no particular order)
o9) Belize
o8) Key West, FL
o7) Washington DC
o6) Puerto Vallarta, Jalisco, Mexico
5) Los Angeles, CA
o4) San Diego, CA
o3) Mexia, TX
o2) NYC
o1) Niagra Falls!

EIGHT Things I Want To Do Before I Die:
o8) Build my own home
o7) attend an NFL game
o6) visit Europe
o5) obtain my MBA
o4) see U2 in concert
o3) become a really good cook
o2) pay off my college loans!
o1) have my own family

SEVEN Ways to Win my Heart:
o7) Like who you are
o6) Like who I am
o5) Know what you want... and go for it
o4) Remember the little things...
o3) Watch Bachelorette with me
o2) Know who's #1 in your life...
o1) You'll have to figure the last one out!

SIX Things I Believe In:
o6) Jesus Christ's supremacy
o5) People really are good
o4) soulmates
o3) friends really do last forever
o2) joy
o1) M&M's melt in your mouth... not in your hand!

FIVE Things I'm Afraid Of:
o5) snakes! YIKES!
o4) Missing an opportunity to show Christ's love to others
o3) never leaving East Texas
o2) breast cancer
o1) losing my parents

FOUR of my Favorite Items in my Bedroom:
o4) my down comforter
o3) my cool mosquito netting mesh thing...
o2) my desk!
o1) my newly organized closet (Thanks potcake!)

THREE Things I Do Everyday:
o3) drink coffee
o2) think about my work
o1) check my e-mail

TWO Things I'm Trying Not to do Right Now:
o2) think about the weekend's events
o1) shiver! It's cold in my house right now!

ONE Person I Want to See Right Now
o1) oh gosh. This is a hard one... I'd rather not say...

Four Letter Words

Yeah, I know what four letter words you were thinking about. No- I'm not talking about that kind! Shame on you! Although, I do have a strong aversion to those four letter words; I'm thinking of other four letter words which are unrelated but often grouped together this time of year. As I twisted the ring on my left hand that has these three words inscribed I started thinking. (Note: that's usually when it gets a little scary!)

I knew what the phrase meant ? but what did the words meant?

So, LeNerdo Beth got out her dictionary. I am part of a generation that has a difficult time with these words individually - not to mention the phrase. It's tough to have all three plates spinning.

True- Wow!I have a hard time being true. I'd like to think that it's because I "don't want to hurt anyone's feelings", but in reality I'm just protecting myself from the hurt I might feel if I'm truthfully true.

true: truthful, real, genuine, faithful (as to a friend), to vow as to a cause; loyal.

Love- :cue laughing: Examples of love are few in this carnal world. The definition of love is best shown in Christ's death for us. We humans attempt to show love in our families and friendships - but it always seems to fall short somehow.

love: a feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person with whom one is disposed [willing] to make a pair

Wait- Are you KIDDING ME? Wait on what? I have a microwave, the internet and a cell phone. I can't remember the last time I had to wait. Actually - I did have to wait a meager 7.5 minutes at the bank today because the elderly lady in front of me had a question about her checking account. I was all upset because the one time I needed to actually enter the bank (and ::gasp:: interact with a real live bank teller!) I had to wait! Imagine that! I don't know how to wait! I hate to drive anywhere further than Houston, TX because I'll have to wait to get there!

wait: to remain or rest in expectation, to remain temporarily neglected or to postpone

So - as I climb down from my soapbox please realize that I'm not trying to say I've conquered these issues. By no means! I just want to encourage you to renew your commitment not only in the typical abstinence based "True Love Waits" way that we traditionally think of, but also in the true-love-waits-before-throwing-a-big-hissy-fit-because-things-aren't-going-
my-way sense as well. 'Cause doesn't love make the world go 'round? It sure makes
the boy at Bodacious a lot easier on the eyes when he's not making my Mel-Man quick enough*!

*this is a disclaimer. I am in no way attracted [love] to the boy over at Bodacious. I was just trying to lighten up my post with a little humor. Geez... folks. I'll get married one day. I wouldn't complain if it was to Mr. Bodacious either! He'd come home smelling soooo scrumptious! But... that's another post on another day. Geez... folks. Always thinking I'm all about the men! Sheesh!